A 31st Birthday Reflection
*this was originally posted on my Facebook page. Facebook, for all it's faults, has a way of making a girl feel special on her birthday.*
Thank you for all the birthday wishes, texts, calls, messages and posts! Thirty one-derful is off to a great start. I'm so fortunate to have spent the weekend surrounded by people I love, enjoying beautiful weather, and eating delicious food. Usually for my birthday, I plan a trip to somewhere I've never been. I love bringing in my new birth year with adventurous energy from time spent taking risks traveling and seeing things I've never seen. This past year, I've done so much of that that I decided to stay put. My goal was to take notice of the newness that abounds around me all day every day: a riverside rock, a hidden path, the sounds of my feet on the gravel, a recipe I've never made...
And it was so, so beautiful.
I took time the day before my birthday to reflect on how much I've accomplished over the last year, how much has changed, and how much I've learned and grown. I did some activities that helped me hone in on what I value/seek in life and what paths that may take in due time. And I paused for several moments of gratitude and appreciation for the love and support I have received from so many people these last 365 days.
Am I exactly where I want to be professionally/financially/personally? Absolutely not. Am I 100% clear on what lies ahead? No way. BUT! I am more clear now than ever before. I'm more me than I've ever been. I'm happier than I've ever been. I'm excited about the changes and the uncertainty that lie ahead (which certainly hasn't always been the case). All that being said, I'd be lying if I claimed that there aren't days where I'm scared as hell. I am. Almost all the time. But I'm okay with that, because I want to live a life that is challenging, that is not risk averse, that is full of adventure, and that welcomes change with a long embrace.
This year, I vow to live life for me. Not in a selfish, ignorant, short-sighted kind of way, but in a way that is all about identifying how I can contribute most profoundly to my community, to the Earth, to my relationships, and yes, to myself. I want to be wholly and authentically me. So I'm going to start. Right now. In this bar with this wine and "cheese". Wine + Cheezits + Cheeto balls on a rainy day are so authentically me.